8.06.2008
out of the mouths of... craig thompson's friends
I'm at work catching up on some blogs I've been out of touch with recently...Just read this post on beloved graphic novelist Craig Thompson's blog with a sketchbook page quoting a conversation with a friend of his. His friend remarks:
"right now, in this world, to love is easy but to let someone else love you is difficult, because you have to show your weaknesses and stop being scared they'll eat you.
Truest.
"right now, in this world, to love is easy but to let someone else love you is difficult, because you have to show your weaknesses and stop being scared they'll eat you.
Truest.
Labels: love, otherpeopleswriting
my favorite poem.
i reread this poem at least once a year and it always feels a little bit more relevant than the year before. i imagine this will peak at age 28, but maybe not... David Berman's book Actual Air is one of my best-loved possessions and I've bought half a dozen copies over the years to give away as gifts to people that needed it.
Self-Portrait At 28
by David Berman
I know it's a bad title
but I'm giving it to myself as a gift
on a day nearly canceled by sunlight
when the entire hill is approaching
the ideal of Virginia
brochured with goldenrod and loblolly
and I think "at least I have not woken up
with a bloody knife in my hand"
by then having absently wandered
one hundred yards from the house
while still seated in this chair
with my eyes closed.
It is a certain hill
the one I imagine when I hear the word "hill"
and if the apocalypse turns out
to be a world-wide nervous breakdown
if our five billion minds collapse at once
well I'd call that a surprise ending
and this hill would still be beautiful
a place I wouldn't mind dying
alone or with you.
I am trying to get at something
and I want to talk very plainly to you
so that we are both comforted by the honesty.
You see there is a window by my desk
I stare out when I am stuck
though the outdoors has rarely inspired me to write
and I don't know why I keep staring at it.
My childhood hasn't made good material either
mostly being a mulch of white minutes
with a few stand out moments,
popping tar bubbles on the driveway in the summer
a certain amount of pride at school
everytime they called it "our sun"
and playing football when the only play
was "go out long" are what stand out now.
If squeezed for more information
I can remember old clock radios
with flipping metal numbers
and an entree called Surf and Turf.
As a way of getting in touch with my origins
every night I set the alarm clock
for the time I was born so that waking up
becomes a historical reenactment and the first thing I do
is take a reading of the day and try to flow with it like
when you're riding a mechanical bull and you strain to learn
the pattern quickly so you don't inadverantly resist it.
II two
I can't remember being born
and no one else can remember it either
even the doctor who I met years later
at a cocktail party.
It's one of the little disappointments
that makes you think about getting away
going to Holly Springs or Coral Gables
and taking a room on the square
with a landlady whose hands are scored
by disinfectant, telling the people you meet
that you are from Alaska, and listen
to what they have to say about Alaska
until you have learned much more about Alaska
than you ever will about Holly Springs or Coral Gables.
Sometimes I am buying a newspaper
in a strange city and think
"I am about to learn what it's like to live here."
Oftentimes there is a news item
about the complaints of homeowners
who live beside the airport
and I realize that I read an article
on this subject nearly once a year
and always receive the same image.
I am in bed late at night
in my house near the airport
listening to the jets fly overhead
a strange wife sleeping beside me.
In my mind, the bedroom is an amalgamation
of various cold medicine commercial sets
(there is always a box of tissue on the nightstand).
I know these recurring news articles are clues,
flaws in the design though I haven't figured out
how to string them together yet,
but I've begun to notice that the same people
are dying over and over again,
for instance Minnie Pearl
who died this year
for the fourth time in four years.
III three
Today is the first day of Lent
and once again I'm not really sure what it is.
How many more years will I let pass
before I take the trouble to ask someone?
It reminds of this morning
when you were getting ready for work.
I was sitting by the space heater
numbly watching you dress
and when you asked why I never wear a robe
I had so many good reasons
I didn't know where to begin.
If you were cool in high school
you didn't ask too many questions.
You could tell who'd been to last night's
big metal concert by the new t-shirts in the hallway.
You didn't have to ask
and that's what cool was:
the ability to deduct
to know without asking.
And the pressure to simulate coolness
means not asking when you don't know,
which is why kids grow ever more stupid.
A yearbook's endpages, filled with promises
to stay in touch, stand as proof of the uselessness
of a teenager's promise. Not like I'm dying
for a letter from the class stoner
ten years on but...
Do you remember the way the girls
would call out "love you!"
conveniently leaving out the "I"
as if they didn't want to commit
to their own declarations.
I agree that the "I" is a pretty heavy concept
and hope you won't get uncomfortable
if I should go into some deeper stuff here.
IV four
There are things I've given up on
like recording funny answering machine messages.
It's part of growing older
and the human race as a group
has matured along the same lines.
It seems our comedy dates the quickest.
If you laugh out loud at Shakespeare's jokes
I hope you won't be insulted
if I say you're trying too hard.
Even sketches from the original Saturday Night Live
seem slow-witted and obvious now.
It's just that our advances are irrepressible.
Nowadays little kids can't even set up lemonade stands.
It makes people too self-conscious about the past,
though try explaining that to a kid.
I'm not saying it should be this way.
All this new technology
will eventually give us new feelings
that will never completely displace the old ones
leaving everyone feeling quite nervous
and split in two.
We will travel to Mars
even as folks on Earth
are still ripping open potato chip
bags with their teeth.
Why? I don't have the time or intelligence
to make all the connections
like my friend Gordon
(this is a true story)
who grew up in Braintree Massachusetts
and had never pictured a brain snagged in a tree
until I brought it up.
He'd never broken the name down to its parts.
By then it was too late.
He had moved to Coral Gables.
V five
The hill out my window is still looking beautiful
suffused in a kind of gold national park light
and it seems to say,
I'm sorry the world could not possibly
use another poem about Orpheus
but I'm available if you're not working
on a self-portrait or anything.
I'm watching my dog have nightmares,
twitching and whining on the office floor
and I try to imagine what beast
has cornered him in the meadow
where his dreams are set.
I'm just letting the day be what it is:
a place for a large number of things
to gather and interact --
not even a place but an occasion
a reality for real things.
Friends warned me not to get too psychedelic
or religious with this piece:
"They won't accept it if it's too psychedelic
or religious," but these are valid topics
and I'm the one with the dog twitching on the floor
possibly dreaming of me
that part of me that would beat a dog
for no good reason
no reason that a dog could see.
I am trying to get at something so simple
that I have to talk plainly
so the words don't disfigure it
and if it turns out that what I say is untrue
then at least let it be harmless
like a leaky boat in the reeds
that is bothering no one.
VI six
I can't trust the accuracy of my own memories,
many of them having blended with sentimental
telephone and margarine commercials
plainly ruined by Madison Avenue
though no one seems to call the advertising world
"Madison Avenue" anymore. Have they moved?
Let's get an update on this.
But first I have some business to take care of.
I walked out to the hill behind our house
which looks positively Alaskan today
and it would be easier to explain this
if I had a picture to show you
but I was with our young dog
and he was running through the tall grass
like running through the tall grass
is all of life together
until a bird calls or he finds a beer can
and that thing fills all the space in his head.
You see,
his mind can only hold one thought at a time
and when he finally hears me call his name
he looks up and cocks his head
and for a single moment
my voice is everything:
Self-portrait at 28.
Self-Portrait At 28
by David Berman
I know it's a bad title
but I'm giving it to myself as a gift
on a day nearly canceled by sunlight
when the entire hill is approaching
the ideal of Virginia
brochured with goldenrod and loblolly
and I think "at least I have not woken up
with a bloody knife in my hand"
by then having absently wandered
one hundred yards from the house
while still seated in this chair
with my eyes closed.
It is a certain hill
the one I imagine when I hear the word "hill"
and if the apocalypse turns out
to be a world-wide nervous breakdown
if our five billion minds collapse at once
well I'd call that a surprise ending
and this hill would still be beautiful
a place I wouldn't mind dying
alone or with you.
I am trying to get at something
and I want to talk very plainly to you
so that we are both comforted by the honesty.
You see there is a window by my desk
I stare out when I am stuck
though the outdoors has rarely inspired me to write
and I don't know why I keep staring at it.
My childhood hasn't made good material either
mostly being a mulch of white minutes
with a few stand out moments,
popping tar bubbles on the driveway in the summer
a certain amount of pride at school
everytime they called it "our sun"
and playing football when the only play
was "go out long" are what stand out now.
If squeezed for more information
I can remember old clock radios
with flipping metal numbers
and an entree called Surf and Turf.
As a way of getting in touch with my origins
every night I set the alarm clock
for the time I was born so that waking up
becomes a historical reenactment and the first thing I do
is take a reading of the day and try to flow with it like
when you're riding a mechanical bull and you strain to learn
the pattern quickly so you don't inadverantly resist it.
II two
I can't remember being born
and no one else can remember it either
even the doctor who I met years later
at a cocktail party.
It's one of the little disappointments
that makes you think about getting away
going to Holly Springs or Coral Gables
and taking a room on the square
with a landlady whose hands are scored
by disinfectant, telling the people you meet
that you are from Alaska, and listen
to what they have to say about Alaska
until you have learned much more about Alaska
than you ever will about Holly Springs or Coral Gables.
Sometimes I am buying a newspaper
in a strange city and think
"I am about to learn what it's like to live here."
Oftentimes there is a news item
about the complaints of homeowners
who live beside the airport
and I realize that I read an article
on this subject nearly once a year
and always receive the same image.
I am in bed late at night
in my house near the airport
listening to the jets fly overhead
a strange wife sleeping beside me.
In my mind, the bedroom is an amalgamation
of various cold medicine commercial sets
(there is always a box of tissue on the nightstand).
I know these recurring news articles are clues,
flaws in the design though I haven't figured out
how to string them together yet,
but I've begun to notice that the same people
are dying over and over again,
for instance Minnie Pearl
who died this year
for the fourth time in four years.
III three
Today is the first day of Lent
and once again I'm not really sure what it is.
How many more years will I let pass
before I take the trouble to ask someone?
It reminds of this morning
when you were getting ready for work.
I was sitting by the space heater
numbly watching you dress
and when you asked why I never wear a robe
I had so many good reasons
I didn't know where to begin.
If you were cool in high school
you didn't ask too many questions.
You could tell who'd been to last night's
big metal concert by the new t-shirts in the hallway.
You didn't have to ask
and that's what cool was:
the ability to deduct
to know without asking.
And the pressure to simulate coolness
means not asking when you don't know,
which is why kids grow ever more stupid.
A yearbook's endpages, filled with promises
to stay in touch, stand as proof of the uselessness
of a teenager's promise. Not like I'm dying
for a letter from the class stoner
ten years on but...
Do you remember the way the girls
would call out "love you!"
conveniently leaving out the "I"
as if they didn't want to commit
to their own declarations.
I agree that the "I" is a pretty heavy concept
and hope you won't get uncomfortable
if I should go into some deeper stuff here.
IV four
There are things I've given up on
like recording funny answering machine messages.
It's part of growing older
and the human race as a group
has matured along the same lines.
It seems our comedy dates the quickest.
If you laugh out loud at Shakespeare's jokes
I hope you won't be insulted
if I say you're trying too hard.
Even sketches from the original Saturday Night Live
seem slow-witted and obvious now.
It's just that our advances are irrepressible.
Nowadays little kids can't even set up lemonade stands.
It makes people too self-conscious about the past,
though try explaining that to a kid.
I'm not saying it should be this way.
All this new technology
will eventually give us new feelings
that will never completely displace the old ones
leaving everyone feeling quite nervous
and split in two.
We will travel to Mars
even as folks on Earth
are still ripping open potato chip
bags with their teeth.
Why? I don't have the time or intelligence
to make all the connections
like my friend Gordon
(this is a true story)
who grew up in Braintree Massachusetts
and had never pictured a brain snagged in a tree
until I brought it up.
He'd never broken the name down to its parts.
By then it was too late.
He had moved to Coral Gables.
V five
The hill out my window is still looking beautiful
suffused in a kind of gold national park light
and it seems to say,
I'm sorry the world could not possibly
use another poem about Orpheus
but I'm available if you're not working
on a self-portrait or anything.
I'm watching my dog have nightmares,
twitching and whining on the office floor
and I try to imagine what beast
has cornered him in the meadow
where his dreams are set.
I'm just letting the day be what it is:
a place for a large number of things
to gather and interact --
not even a place but an occasion
a reality for real things.
Friends warned me not to get too psychedelic
or religious with this piece:
"They won't accept it if it's too psychedelic
or religious," but these are valid topics
and I'm the one with the dog twitching on the floor
possibly dreaming of me
that part of me that would beat a dog
for no good reason
no reason that a dog could see.
I am trying to get at something so simple
that I have to talk plainly
so the words don't disfigure it
and if it turns out that what I say is untrue
then at least let it be harmless
like a leaky boat in the reeds
that is bothering no one.
VI six
I can't trust the accuracy of my own memories,
many of them having blended with sentimental
telephone and margarine commercials
plainly ruined by Madison Avenue
though no one seems to call the advertising world
"Madison Avenue" anymore. Have they moved?
Let's get an update on this.
But first I have some business to take care of.
I walked out to the hill behind our house
which looks positively Alaskan today
and it would be easier to explain this
if I had a picture to show you
but I was with our young dog
and he was running through the tall grass
like running through the tall grass
is all of life together
until a bird calls or he finds a beer can
and that thing fills all the space in his head.
You see,
his mind can only hold one thought at a time
and when he finally hears me call his name
he looks up and cocks his head
and for a single moment
my voice is everything:
Self-portrait at 28.
Labels: poetry
7.22.2008
all my relationships i fucked up in all the right ways
Last night while he was sleeping, I finished his first mix. I'll let you figure out the rest:
1. Fuckup - Rock Plaza Central
2. 5 Years Time - Noah and the Whale
3. Jackeyed - Micah P. Hinson
4. Red and Purple - The Dodos
5. Fools Rush In - Etta James
6. Baby - Os Mutantes
7. I'll Be Your Baby Tonight - Bob Dylan
8. Please Don't Be Gentle With Me - The Minutemen
9. Give You My Lovin' - Mazzy Star
10. In My Lady's House - Iron and Wine
11. When I Hold You In My Arms - Neil Young
12. Welfare Bread - King Khan & His Shrines
13. July, July! - The Decemberists
14. White Water Hymnal - Fleet Foxes
15. Tume To Go - Holly Golightly & The Brokeoffs
16. Paper Tiger - Spoon
17. Glad Tidings - Sound Team
18. Be Still My Heart - The Postal Service
19. Way Too Good - Figurine
20. Sweepstakes Prize - Mirah
21. My Slumbering Heart - Rilo Kiley
22. While You Were Sleeping - Elvis Perkins
23. Thirteen - Elliott Smith
1. Fuckup - Rock Plaza Central
2. 5 Years Time - Noah and the Whale
3. Jackeyed - Micah P. Hinson
4. Red and Purple - The Dodos
5. Fools Rush In - Etta James
6. Baby - Os Mutantes
7. I'll Be Your Baby Tonight - Bob Dylan
8. Please Don't Be Gentle With Me - The Minutemen
9. Give You My Lovin' - Mazzy Star
10. In My Lady's House - Iron and Wine
11. When I Hold You In My Arms - Neil Young
12. Welfare Bread - King Khan & His Shrines
13. July, July! - The Decemberists
14. White Water Hymnal - Fleet Foxes
15. Tume To Go - Holly Golightly & The Brokeoffs
16. Paper Tiger - Spoon
17. Glad Tidings - Sound Team
18. Be Still My Heart - The Postal Service
19. Way Too Good - Figurine
20. Sweepstakes Prize - Mirah
21. My Slumbering Heart - Rilo Kiley
22. While You Were Sleeping - Elvis Perkins
23. Thirteen - Elliott Smith
Labels: lovedones, mixtapes, music
7.20.2008
Eyes Closed Monsters: 0003
Eyes-closed drawings among my friends and I were born almost a decade ago when Rhymi and I used to spend a lot of time coming up with 'games' to play with a paper and pen at Kerbey Lane or Flipnotics. We had lots of games, but a favorite was "close your eyes and draw ________". Sometimes we would do it with people we knew and then try to guess at who the other person had drawn. But generally, bugs and monsters were the biggest hits. Years went by and I would occasionally think to ask people to close their eyes and draw me a monster. Eventually I decided it would be a good art project and got dozens of submissions from friends and my (then) new coworkers at BookPeople. Sadly, I never did anything with all of the drawings other than love the hell out of them. Now I want you to love them too. And, ideally, this will spawn an eyes-closed monsters boom. Cory made me a button of his eyes closed monsty, and all of them just beg for stuffed animal adaptations. The spirit of eyes-closed monsters if mos def 'open source', so if you have any great ideas for these guys: do it!
And if you draw a monster with your eyes closed, please email me your drawing and I'll put it up, and maybe someday get a tattoo of it or something.
What I like about this monster is that even though it's eyes-closed and all, anyone who knows Rebekah Ross well would be able to tell you it was hers immediately. Her drawing style, even blind, is inimitable and amazing. I still have a drawing she made 8 years ago of 'renegade teddy bears' hanging on my wall. Amazing! Another thing I like about this monster is that it's face is on it's neck. Scary!
And if you draw a monster with your eyes closed, please email me your drawing and I'll put it up, and maybe someday get a tattoo of it or something.
What I like about this monster is that even though it's eyes-closed and all, anyone who knows Rebekah Ross well would be able to tell you it was hers immediately. Her drawing style, even blind, is inimitable and amazing. I still have a drawing she made 8 years ago of 'renegade teddy bears' hanging on my wall. Amazing! Another thing I like about this monster is that it's face is on it's neck. Scary!
Labels: eyesclosedmonsters
7.11.2008
Drumroll! My (Highly Subjective) Top Ten Animated Movies of All Time!
I whiled away the afternoon at work writing and rewriting and rewriting this list following a discussion with my lovely animator BFF Jeff Freeman about how Wall-E had easily made it into each of our theoretical top fives.
The list started as a simple way to pass the time and turned into a hotly discussed and debated piece of parchment. There were at least ten drafts before the 'final' one, below, with annotation. One aspect of the discussion (mostly between Freeman and I, unsurprisingly) was what exactly the criteria for the accolade was. There was no final word on how it should be decided but I'd say the list below uses the following criteria roughly equally:
Sentimental/personal value: These movies all mean a lot to me because I'm me. It's not meant to be universal, and I would fully expect anyone else's list to be completely different.
History / Innovation / Singularity: That said, representing major types and localities of animation was important to me, as well as recognizing certain landmarks. Fantasia almost made the cut for this reason alone, but I booted it because it's personal value to me is almost null. However, there was a sense of needing to have a representative movie from the east, a representative stop-motion film, etc.
Artistic / Creative Achievement: I think all of the top ten movies could be called 'masterpieces' from a purely artistic standpoint.
As far as what qualifies..Eventually the rule I came up with is that if it's animation on top of live action backgrounds, the animation is more of an 'effect' -- hence Who Framed Roger Rabbit was not considered. But if there is limited live action 'on top' of the animation -- i.e. Wall-E -- it qualifies as full length animation. The Phantom Tollbooth was allowed because the live action serves as a very brief bookend to what is really a full length animated movie. Puppet movies don't count, stop motion does. Shorts are excluded, that's a list of it's own.
Summer: At least half of the top ten use anthropomorphized animals or robots to deal with themes of equality or humanism -- freedom from oppression.
Jeff: Cartoons about humans are dumb.
Summer: Yeah, but they're still human themes. Unless animators are a bunch of radical animal/robot rights activists. Although NIMH might actually be about mice...
Summer: Let's not even get started on Bambi... Talk about radical!
By far the best response to the list was from Jerome: "I guess I'll forgive you for not including The Great Mouse Detective."
It should be noted that I am not really a fan of computer animation and your pleading arguments for Finding Nemo or The Incredibles will not do anything for me. Yes, I've seen them. I can appreciate that a lot of people like those movies, but I really don't. I find Wall-E to be the disarming, beautiful, wonderful, singular exception that proves my rule.
Okay, here:
Close but no cigar: Waking Life, Fantasia, Bambi, Pinocchio, Robin Hood, Spirited Away, The Rescuers, Sleeping Beauty, Watership Down, Charlotte's Web, The Lion King, The Little Mermaid, Batman: Mask of the Phantasm, Metropolis, An American Tail, Princess Mononoke, Paprika, Yellow Submarine, An American Tail, Ghost In The Shell, The Corpse Bride, James And The Giant Peach, Wallace & Gromit: Curse Of The Were-Rabbit...
10. The Nightmare Before Christmas
Hotly contested by Freeman. But I love this movie. Maybe a little less than I did once, because as he rightly pointed out, the songs wear on you a bit after years of hearing them. But this movie was one of the first times I was overwhelmed by the beauty of animation and felt true wonder during a full-length animated film, other than as a small child. The character design is creative and classic. Jack Skellington is a perfect antihero. Sally is lovely and strange. There's a reason these characters have endured. They are Mickey and Minnie for the young and the alternative.
9. The Phantom Tollbooth
This charming and simple movie is what animation for children feels like at it's best. It's not showy or particularly innovative or splashy or bright, but the adaptation of Jules Feiffer's wonderful book illustrations is exactly what this story deserves. Magical.
8. The Secret of NIMH
This movie is representin' Don Bluth and all he did in the 80s that was really the continuation of the wonderful and funny, not-so-epic, beautifully drawn Disney movies in the 60s-70s that were all but forgotten by the languishing Disney studios at the time. I mean, didn't this come out the same year as 'The Black Cauldron'? Don Bluth picked up where they left off and proved that someone else could make wonderful children's animation. This movie is still fucking scary and dark and serious and awesome.
7. 101 Dalmations
A lot of Disney movies got 'cut' at the last minute to make room for other things, but Dalmations had to stay. It has some of the best music of any animated film ever, the art style is unique and singular to this day, the characters are unforgettable (Cruella!), the voice acting is the best I can think of, and it's always, always, always 'watchable.' I love this movie. Walt Disney kind of hated it, weirdly enough. What does he know? Oh, yeah.
6. Akira
I am not personally equipped to write eloquently about this film, although I love it very much and it has had an enormous impact and if you have not seen it, you really should. I'll leave it at that
5. The Triplets of Belleville
This delightful movie singlehandedly revitalized my passion for animation. It seems to be both a huge step forward and a nod to the past. Unforgettable. Sad. Whimsical. Funny. Heartbreaking. It's a 'cartoon' in a very real sense, but also very serious. It straddles the line between animation as 'entertainment' and animation as 'art.'
4. The Iron Giant
This movie is perfect. I cry every single time I watch it, and the animation itself takes my breath away.
3. Wall-E
This movie is perfect. It exceeded my incredibly high expectations and impressed me even further the second time I saw it. Everything from the story to the visual to the sound design to the music is innovative and different and yet completely classic. I find myself thinking about Wall-E and Eve every single day.
2. My Neighbor Totoro
This movie is perfect. Totoros are now an important part of my personal mythologies. And this has to be my favorite animated movie from a visual perspective. I could freeze any frame of this film and frame it as art. All that, while appealing to kids on a basic and primitive level at the same time. Magic, magic!
1. Lady And The Tramp
This movie is perfect. It's a romantic comedy disguised as a children's movie. And although the Lion King likes to claim this honor on a technicality, L&TT is really the first 'original story' to be made into a Disney animated feature. AND it's hilarious and true and beautiful and I never ever get tired of it, ever, although I've been watching it at least once a year for at least twenty years.
The list started as a simple way to pass the time and turned into a hotly discussed and debated piece of parchment. There were at least ten drafts before the 'final' one, below, with annotation. One aspect of the discussion (mostly between Freeman and I, unsurprisingly) was what exactly the criteria for the accolade was. There was no final word on how it should be decided but I'd say the list below uses the following criteria roughly equally:
Sentimental/personal value: These movies all mean a lot to me because I'm me. It's not meant to be universal, and I would fully expect anyone else's list to be completely different.
History / Innovation / Singularity: That said, representing major types and localities of animation was important to me, as well as recognizing certain landmarks. Fantasia almost made the cut for this reason alone, but I booted it because it's personal value to me is almost null. However, there was a sense of needing to have a representative movie from the east, a representative stop-motion film, etc.
Artistic / Creative Achievement: I think all of the top ten movies could be called 'masterpieces' from a purely artistic standpoint.
As far as what qualifies..Eventually the rule I came up with is that if it's animation on top of live action backgrounds, the animation is more of an 'effect' -- hence Who Framed Roger Rabbit was not considered. But if there is limited live action 'on top' of the animation -- i.e. Wall-E -- it qualifies as full length animation. The Phantom Tollbooth was allowed because the live action serves as a very brief bookend to what is really a full length animated movie. Puppet movies don't count, stop motion does. Shorts are excluded, that's a list of it's own.
Summer: At least half of the top ten use anthropomorphized animals or robots to deal with themes of equality or humanism -- freedom from oppression.
Jeff: Cartoons about humans are dumb.
Summer: Yeah, but they're still human themes. Unless animators are a bunch of radical animal/robot rights activists. Although NIMH might actually be about mice...
Summer: Let's not even get started on Bambi... Talk about radical!
By far the best response to the list was from Jerome: "I guess I'll forgive you for not including The Great Mouse Detective."
It should be noted that I am not really a fan of computer animation and your pleading arguments for Finding Nemo or The Incredibles will not do anything for me. Yes, I've seen them. I can appreciate that a lot of people like those movies, but I really don't. I find Wall-E to be the disarming, beautiful, wonderful, singular exception that proves my rule.
Okay, here:
Close but no cigar: Waking Life, Fantasia, Bambi, Pinocchio, Robin Hood, Spirited Away, The Rescuers, Sleeping Beauty, Watership Down, Charlotte's Web, The Lion King, The Little Mermaid, Batman: Mask of the Phantasm, Metropolis, An American Tail, Princess Mononoke, Paprika, Yellow Submarine, An American Tail, Ghost In The Shell, The Corpse Bride, James And The Giant Peach, Wallace & Gromit: Curse Of The Were-Rabbit...
10. The Nightmare Before Christmas
Hotly contested by Freeman. But I love this movie. Maybe a little less than I did once, because as he rightly pointed out, the songs wear on you a bit after years of hearing them. But this movie was one of the first times I was overwhelmed by the beauty of animation and felt true wonder during a full-length animated film, other than as a small child. The character design is creative and classic. Jack Skellington is a perfect antihero. Sally is lovely and strange. There's a reason these characters have endured. They are Mickey and Minnie for the young and the alternative.
9. The Phantom Tollbooth
This charming and simple movie is what animation for children feels like at it's best. It's not showy or particularly innovative or splashy or bright, but the adaptation of Jules Feiffer's wonderful book illustrations is exactly what this story deserves. Magical.
8. The Secret of NIMH
This movie is representin' Don Bluth and all he did in the 80s that was really the continuation of the wonderful and funny, not-so-epic, beautifully drawn Disney movies in the 60s-70s that were all but forgotten by the languishing Disney studios at the time. I mean, didn't this come out the same year as 'The Black Cauldron'? Don Bluth picked up where they left off and proved that someone else could make wonderful children's animation. This movie is still fucking scary and dark and serious and awesome.
7. 101 Dalmations
A lot of Disney movies got 'cut' at the last minute to make room for other things, but Dalmations had to stay. It has some of the best music of any animated film ever, the art style is unique and singular to this day, the characters are unforgettable (Cruella!), the voice acting is the best I can think of, and it's always, always, always 'watchable.' I love this movie. Walt Disney kind of hated it, weirdly enough. What does he know? Oh, yeah.
6. Akira
I am not personally equipped to write eloquently about this film, although I love it very much and it has had an enormous impact and if you have not seen it, you really should. I'll leave it at that
5. The Triplets of Belleville
This delightful movie singlehandedly revitalized my passion for animation. It seems to be both a huge step forward and a nod to the past. Unforgettable. Sad. Whimsical. Funny. Heartbreaking. It's a 'cartoon' in a very real sense, but also very serious. It straddles the line between animation as 'entertainment' and animation as 'art.'
4. The Iron Giant
This movie is perfect. I cry every single time I watch it, and the animation itself takes my breath away.
3. Wall-E
This movie is perfect. It exceeded my incredibly high expectations and impressed me even further the second time I saw it. Everything from the story to the visual to the sound design to the music is innovative and different and yet completely classic. I find myself thinking about Wall-E and Eve every single day.
2. My Neighbor Totoro
This movie is perfect. Totoros are now an important part of my personal mythologies. And this has to be my favorite animated movie from a visual perspective. I could freeze any frame of this film and frame it as art. All that, while appealing to kids on a basic and primitive level at the same time. Magic, magic!
1. Lady And The Tramp
This movie is perfect. It's a romantic comedy disguised as a children's movie. And although the Lion King likes to claim this honor on a technicality, L&TT is really the first 'original story' to be made into a Disney animated feature. AND it's hilarious and true and beautiful and I never ever get tired of it, ever, although I've been watching it at least once a year for at least twenty years.
Labels: animation, lists, movies
7.09.2008
Your Weekly Poem About Jonathan Taylor Thomas: Four
When I was thirteen, I wrote approximately 100 poems about my true love and soulmate, Jonathan Taylor Thomas (from the television show 'Home Improvement'). I present to you: Your Weekly Poem About Jonathan Taylor Thomas. In case you ever thought I was cool. Punctuation, 'form', and spelling are left intact: that's comedy!
Sorry this is late! My birthday was yesterday and I was a bit distracted. I hope JTT doesn't doubt my commitment.
Late
The clock blinks 1:31
And this morning I woke early
I'm more tired than ever
I wanna fall asleep
But you are all I can think of
Honey, you're the one
With you in L.A.
And me in Austin
These thoughts won't ever let me be.
Sorry this is late! My birthday was yesterday and I was a bit distracted. I hope JTT doesn't doubt my commitment.
Late
The clock blinks 1:31
And this morning I woke early
I'm more tired than ever
I wanna fall asleep
But you are all I can think of
Honey, you're the one
With you in L.A.
And me in Austin
These thoughts won't ever let me be.
Labels: jtt
6.30.2008
Your Weekly Poem About Jonathan Taylor Thomas: Three
When I was thirteen, I wrote approximately 100 poems about my true love and soulmate, Jonathan Taylor Thomas (from the television show 'Home Improvement'). I present to you: Your Weekly Poem About Jonathan Taylor Thomas. In case you ever thought I was cool. Punctuation, 'form', and spelling are left intact: that's comedy!
Classic Love
Passion.
Love.
Desire.
Need.
Caring.
The stuff of soaps
And romance novels
But what I feel for you.
They say love is gone
to Divorice courts and hate
But I still love you.
So many give up
Say it's too hard for me
But I won't ever give up on you
Classic romance
Is down the drain
But my dreams of flowers are all about you
Although, maybe I should say
You don't feel anything for me
But, hey, I still adore you.
True love lives on
Despite of what's around
Cause a girl dreams of you.
Classic Love
Passion.
Love.
Desire.
Need.
Caring.
The stuff of soaps
And romance novels
But what I feel for you.
They say love is gone
to Divorice courts and hate
But I still love you.
So many give up
Say it's too hard for me
But I won't ever give up on you
Classic romance
Is down the drain
But my dreams of flowers are all about you
Although, maybe I should say
You don't feel anything for me
But, hey, I still adore you.
True love lives on
Despite of what's around
Cause a girl dreams of you.
Labels: jtt
6.25.2008
Eyes Closed Monsters: 0002
Eyes-closed drawings among my friends and I were born almost a decade ago when Rhymi and I used to spend a lot of time coming up with 'games' to play with a paper and pen at Kerbey Lane or Flipnotics. We had lots of games, but a favorite was "close your eyes and draw ________". Sometimes we would do it with people we knew and then try to guess at who the other person had drawn. But generally, bugs and monsters were the biggest hits. Years went by and I would occasionally think to ask people to close their eyes and draw me a monster. Eventually I decided it would be a good art project and got dozens of submissions from friends and my (then) new coworkers at BookPeople. Sadly, I never did anything with all of the drawings other than love the hell out of them. Now I want you to love them too. And, ideally, this will spawn an eyes-closed monsters boom. Cory made me a button of his eyes closed monsty, and all of them just beg for stuffed animal adaptations. The spirit of eyes-closed monsters if mos def 'open source', so if you have any great ideas for these guys: do it!
And if you draw a monster with your eyes closed, please email me your drawing and I'll put it up, and maybe someday get a tattoo of it or something.
Conor drew this guy on the back of one of BP's 'note to buyer' sheets, often used for creative endeavors over the years. I like him. He looks like a crab bending backwards. The monster, not Conor.
And if you draw a monster with your eyes closed, please email me your drawing and I'll put it up, and maybe someday get a tattoo of it or something.
Conor drew this guy on the back of one of BP's 'note to buyer' sheets, often used for creative endeavors over the years. I like him. He looks like a crab bending backwards. The monster, not Conor.
Labels: eyeclosedmonsters
6.24.2008
Your Weekly Poem About Jonathan Taylor Thomas: Two
When I was thirteen, I wrote approximately 100 poems about my true love and soulmate, Jonathan Taylor Thomas (from the television show 'Home Improvement'). I present to you: Your Weekly Poem About Jonathan Taylor Thomas. In case you ever thought I was cool. Punctuation, 'form', and spelling are left intact: that's comedy!
-
Why not?
Is it to much to ask
to hold your hand,
kiss your mouth,
hold you close,
feel your touch
Do I not deserve to
hear your voice
wear your shirt
mend your wounds
give you gifts
why can't we
watch a movie
hike together
see the sunset
travel the world
All I ever wanted was
to wear your ring
make you dinner
share your life
be together
-
'mend your wounds'?! Discuss.
-
Why not?
Is it to much to ask
to hold your hand,
kiss your mouth,
hold you close,
feel your touch
Do I not deserve to
hear your voice
wear your shirt
mend your wounds
give you gifts
why can't we
watch a movie
hike together
see the sunset
travel the world
All I ever wanted was
to wear your ring
make you dinner
share your life
be together
-
'mend your wounds'?! Discuss.
Labels: jtt
6.18.2008
Miniature Soundtracks : Episode Six
Miniature Soundtracks is my small experiment in mp3 blogging. I'll be using a beloved image from my flickr photostream or favorites, reflect on it for a few sentences, and then give you a song that evokes the same feelings. If your photo or song is featured and you'd rather it not be, let me know and I'll take it down immediately.
When people leave, it's kind of exciting at first. It's like a wedding: you get the chance to express all of your emotions and be as cheesy as you want without being seen as a sap fest or corny or uncool. Leaving mix CDs are the best ones I've ever made. There's a tertiary goal of most mixes where, in addition to just sharing music or making someone happy or expressing some feelings, you're also trying to create a tie between you and something beautiful in the person's mind. It's a wonder to think that every time Freeman hears New Slang he thinks of me, and I'd like to think it's because I'm that beautiful, but really it's probably because I put it on the first mix tape I ever made for him, four years ago. When someone leaves, it's even better, because they are missing home and everything in it, hopefully yourself included, and the songs you hang them before they go are the closest thing they've got. You can make your own ghost self as beautiful as you want. When Rissa left the first time, I made her a CD that brought the waterworks on the greyhound. I think it's a good half of the reason why we're as close as we are now. The thing is, after the fun of getting to say "I love you" and hugging and mix CD giving and send offs and back pats wears off, someone is gone. And when they are the one person you want to see, you can't. Maybe they're coming back after awhile, and maybe it will be good for them, and maybe it will even be good for you. But they're gone -- gone! and all the songs in the world won't help much when you really want their face. Prepare yourself.
Unravel : Okkervil River [Bjork cover] from 'Sham Wedding / Hoax Funeral.
When people leave, it's kind of exciting at first. It's like a wedding: you get the chance to express all of your emotions and be as cheesy as you want without being seen as a sap fest or corny or uncool. Leaving mix CDs are the best ones I've ever made. There's a tertiary goal of most mixes where, in addition to just sharing music or making someone happy or expressing some feelings, you're also trying to create a tie between you and something beautiful in the person's mind. It's a wonder to think that every time Freeman hears New Slang he thinks of me, and I'd like to think it's because I'm that beautiful, but really it's probably because I put it on the first mix tape I ever made for him, four years ago. When someone leaves, it's even better, because they are missing home and everything in it, hopefully yourself included, and the songs you hang them before they go are the closest thing they've got. You can make your own ghost self as beautiful as you want. When Rissa left the first time, I made her a CD that brought the waterworks on the greyhound. I think it's a good half of the reason why we're as close as we are now. The thing is, after the fun of getting to say "I love you" and hugging and mix CD giving and send offs and back pats wears off, someone is gone. And when they are the one person you want to see, you can't. Maybe they're coming back after awhile, and maybe it will be good for them, and maybe it will even be good for you. But they're gone -- gone! and all the songs in the world won't help much when you really want their face. Prepare yourself.
Unravel : Okkervil River [Bjork cover] from 'Sham Wedding / Hoax Funeral.
Labels: miniaturesoundtracks, music
6.16.2008
Your Weekly Poem About Jonathan Taylor Thomas
When I was thirteen, I wrote approximately 100 poems about my true love and soulmate, Jonathan Taylor Thomas (from the television show 'Home Improvement'). I present to you: Your Weekly Poem About Jonathan Taylor Thomas. In case you ever thought I was cool. Punctuation, 'form', and spelling are left intact: that's comedy!
Why I Need Him
I would cry for help
But no one will answer
Which is why I
would cry for help
Family thinks me asleep
Friends are past curfews
Dog is resting
All I want is him.
I need his shoulder
I want his hand
I desire his lips
And
I connect to his soul
Why I Need Him
I would cry for help
But no one will answer
Which is why I
would cry for help
Family thinks me asleep
Friends are past curfews
Dog is resting
All I want is him.
I need his shoulder
I want his hand
I desire his lips
And
I connect to his soul
Labels: jtt
6.15.2008
Eyes Closed Monsters: 0001
Hello, hello. Let me introduce: Eyes closed monsters!
Eyes-closed drawings among my friends and I were born almost a decade ago when Rhymi and I used to spend a lot of time coming up with 'games' to play with a paper and pen at Kerbey Lane or Flipnotics. We had lots of games, but a favorite was "close your eyes and draw ________". Sometimes we would do it with people we knew and then try to guess at who the other person had drawn. But generally, bugs and monsters were the biggest hits. Years went by and I would occasionally think to ask people to close their eyes and draw me a monster. Eventually I decided it would be a good art project and got dozens of submissions from friends and my (then) new coworkers at BookPeople. Sadly, I never did anything with all of the drawings other than love the hell out of them. Now I want you to love them too. And, ideally, this will spawn an eyes-closed monsters boom. Cory made me a button of his eyes closed monsty, and all of them just beg for stuffed animal adaptations. The spirit of eyes-closed monsters if mos def 'open source', so if you have any great ideas for these guys: do it!
And if you draw a monster with your eyes closed, please email me your drawing and I'll put it up, and maybe someday get a tattoo of it or something.
For my first 'eyes closed monsty' post, I'm featuring my mom's purple and, let's face it, kind of adorable monster. Not scary at all, but that's what mom monsters are for.
Eyes-closed drawings among my friends and I were born almost a decade ago when Rhymi and I used to spend a lot of time coming up with 'games' to play with a paper and pen at Kerbey Lane or Flipnotics. We had lots of games, but a favorite was "close your eyes and draw ________". Sometimes we would do it with people we knew and then try to guess at who the other person had drawn. But generally, bugs and monsters were the biggest hits. Years went by and I would occasionally think to ask people to close their eyes and draw me a monster. Eventually I decided it would be a good art project and got dozens of submissions from friends and my (then) new coworkers at BookPeople. Sadly, I never did anything with all of the drawings other than love the hell out of them. Now I want you to love them too. And, ideally, this will spawn an eyes-closed monsters boom. Cory made me a button of his eyes closed monsty, and all of them just beg for stuffed animal adaptations. The spirit of eyes-closed monsters if mos def 'open source', so if you have any great ideas for these guys: do it!
And if you draw a monster with your eyes closed, please email me your drawing and I'll put it up, and maybe someday get a tattoo of it or something.
For my first 'eyes closed monsty' post, I'm featuring my mom's purple and, let's face it, kind of adorable monster. Not scary at all, but that's what mom monsters are for.
Labels: eyesclosedmonsters
She Made It All Up
I wrote this story last year as an attempt to 1. write as an adolescent boy, a species that I am morbidly fascinated by, and 2. try to write 'funny.' Not sure if I succeeded really on either of those fronts, but I kind of like the story anyway.
She Made It All Up
by Summer Burton
One thing that never happened is that Amanda Lane never kissed me. She didn’t ask me to walk with her behind the oak tree next to the playscape; she didn’t look at me with her eyelids all low, which makes her face look weird but older; she didn’t reach up for my face and pretend to brush something out of my hair while leaning closer and closer to me so I could pretty much smell everything she ate for lunch and breakfast; and I definitely didn’t find myself pressing my mouth to hers and even opening it a little, enough that the very tip of her tongue was between my lips. That did not happen.
The reason that didn’t happen, and could never happen, and if in some bizarre alternate universe it did happen would be a big, big problem: Amanda is my best-friend-from-third-grade Thomas’ girl and they are going to get married. Or at least that’s what Thomas told me the day before Amanda did not kiss me. I told him that was a pretty pussy thing to say and that no one got married to their seventh grade girlfriends and that if they did get married she would probably divorce him and take all of his money, but Thomas shook his head and said it was love. At which point I did not feel even the slightest bit sick or jealous or weird, in fact I felt so normal that I called him a chick and hit him on his shoulder.
Amanda looks a little bit like Natalie Portman from the Star Wars movies. Mostly in two ways: one is that she is really skinny but she doesn’t look all bony like Theresa Williams or models, and the other is that she has this smile that’s really hard to look at. It’s hard to look at her smile (Natalie Portman’s or Amanda’s) because it seems like she knows something that you don’t, and also like she knows that you don’t know it, and also that she thinks that’s kind of funny and sad and sweet all at the same time. It’s terrible.
Amanda lives on my block and her parents have more money than mine which I know is true because Amanda has a new bike, not a used one from Goodwill, and because one time she told me that they have a maid. I looked for the maid at their house every time I passed by but then later she told me that she only comes once every two weeks, so they aren’t that rich.
Thomas lives further away but he has a new bike too and sometimes he rides it to my house and then we go to Amanda’s house and make fun of her together. Thomas says that it makes her like him more. I guess he’s right because, after a while, they usually tell me to go home so they can make out. I have never made out with someone at my house or at their house, and I guess sometimes I kind of wonder what that’s like but I never stop at Amanda’s window and glance in on my way across her yard. If I did it would just be to take notes for my future make out sessions with girlfriends who will have smiles that don’t make me feel stupid. But I don’t.
I did make out with Theresa Williams two months ago in the back yard of a party at Terrence Rhodes’ house. She was wearing a sweatshirt so she looked less bony than usual and besides I just needed the practice. Afterwards she said that we were going out and I told her that she was a bad kisser, which was only half the truth and the other half is something that I can’t talk about, but I swear it doesn’t have anything to do with Amanda.
Amanda and Thomas have been together for five months, which is longer than anyone else in our grade has ever gone out with anyone, so it seems like it’s pretty serious. So, if there was some weirdo universe where Amanda kissed me behind that tree, and where my entire chest and stomach felt like they were filled with tiny ticklish pieces of fur or confetti or something, I’d be pretty confused right now. Luckily, that didn’t happen and I feel completely normal and nothing on my insides feels like it’s been rearranged at all.
One time Thomas asked me who I thought the prettiest girl in our grade was and I asked him if he wanted the truth. This is because I can not lie to my best friend, but I know that sometimes people would prefer that you lie and I guess if he ever asked me not to tell him something for his own good I could lie then. But he said he wanted the truth and so I told him Amanda. I thought he might hit me but he just said “I know, man. She’s so fucking hot.” Thomas doesn’t say “fucking” very often so I knew he was trying to make sure that I was paying attention to what he was saying. He put his hand on my back. “I’m glad you support me, man.” I wasn’t sure what that meant but I guess he was saying that me saying Amanda was hot meant that I was happy for him that she was his girl. I guess that should be true.
My mom doesn’t seem to like Amanda’s family very much and every time she runs into Amanda’s mom she ends up in our kitchen telling my dad how “waspy” the Lanes are. I guess I know what she means. Amanda’s mom is just like a taller version of Amanda with her skin pulled a little bit tighter, and I guess they both seem like they might be hiding some kind of poison stinger behind their backs. The smile that’s hard to look at might just be a trick to get you stung, you know?
It’s good that Amanda did not kiss me behind that tree and that I didn’t feel her boobs pressed against my t-shirt and that she didn’t tell me afterwards she wanted to break up with Thomas to go out with me because I was a nicer kisser, because if she did than I would probably have run home and put my entire head under the kitchen sink to calm down before Thomas came over and then when he did I would have been really freaked out and he would keep asking me what was wrong and I would keep saying ‘nothing’ even though that wouldn’t be true and then I would have a feeling in my stomach even worse than the one I would have had when Amanda’s mouth was so soft, a feeling that I was keeping something from my best-friend-since-third-grade and then Thomas might have suggested that we go over to Amanda’s and I might have flinched or made some kind of weird face and he might have said “what, man?” and I might have shrugged and, not knowing what to say, I might have said that I thought she was kind of a bitch for not letting him feel up her shirt yet after a whole five months and Thomas might have looked really thoughtful and then said “you’re right man” and then later, after his mom agreed to let him spend the night since it was a Friday, he might suggest that we play some kind of joke on Amanda and we might have grabbed all of the toilet paper in my bathroom and snuck out and thrown it all up in her trees and then the next day Amanda’s mom might come over and ask my mom about it and I might start crying and Thomas might call me a pussy and get on his bike and go home and then Amanda’s mom might tell her that we had done it and Amanda might not speak to me or Thomas for a whole week at school, she might just smile her terrible way and make us both feel small, so small. And Thomas might forgive me for letting on that we had rolled the house, but I might never forget that I hadn’t told him about what really happened with Amanda and then one day, two months later, when I had a new girlfriend – Stacy Park, who is almost as pretty as Amanda and has much bigger boobs – Amanda might smile her terrible smile at us in class and then pass Thomas a note that he will read and then crumple up into a ball and then he might stare at his desk for awhile before staring at me for awhile and we will all know everything, and then Thomas might hit me in the face and Stacy might break up with me after Amanda tells her the whole story too, and then I might be alone almost all the time and then one day I would ride my bike past Amanda’s house and see Thomas’ bike locked to the tree and I would not, I would never, lower my head and look into their window and see his hands underneath her sweater, see them holding each other and see Amanda smile some different smile, one that I’d never seen before, a smile that would make me look away and make my feet feel heavy with everything inside of me dropped right into them.
So, it’s good that Amanda didn’t kiss me, even if it might have all felt worth it anyway.
She Made It All Up
by Summer Burton
One thing that never happened is that Amanda Lane never kissed me. She didn’t ask me to walk with her behind the oak tree next to the playscape; she didn’t look at me with her eyelids all low, which makes her face look weird but older; she didn’t reach up for my face and pretend to brush something out of my hair while leaning closer and closer to me so I could pretty much smell everything she ate for lunch and breakfast; and I definitely didn’t find myself pressing my mouth to hers and even opening it a little, enough that the very tip of her tongue was between my lips. That did not happen.
The reason that didn’t happen, and could never happen, and if in some bizarre alternate universe it did happen would be a big, big problem: Amanda is my best-friend-from-third-grade Thomas’ girl and they are going to get married. Or at least that’s what Thomas told me the day before Amanda did not kiss me. I told him that was a pretty pussy thing to say and that no one got married to their seventh grade girlfriends and that if they did get married she would probably divorce him and take all of his money, but Thomas shook his head and said it was love. At which point I did not feel even the slightest bit sick or jealous or weird, in fact I felt so normal that I called him a chick and hit him on his shoulder.
Amanda looks a little bit like Natalie Portman from the Star Wars movies. Mostly in two ways: one is that she is really skinny but she doesn’t look all bony like Theresa Williams or models, and the other is that she has this smile that’s really hard to look at. It’s hard to look at her smile (Natalie Portman’s or Amanda’s) because it seems like she knows something that you don’t, and also like she knows that you don’t know it, and also that she thinks that’s kind of funny and sad and sweet all at the same time. It’s terrible.
Amanda lives on my block and her parents have more money than mine which I know is true because Amanda has a new bike, not a used one from Goodwill, and because one time she told me that they have a maid. I looked for the maid at their house every time I passed by but then later she told me that she only comes once every two weeks, so they aren’t that rich.
Thomas lives further away but he has a new bike too and sometimes he rides it to my house and then we go to Amanda’s house and make fun of her together. Thomas says that it makes her like him more. I guess he’s right because, after a while, they usually tell me to go home so they can make out. I have never made out with someone at my house or at their house, and I guess sometimes I kind of wonder what that’s like but I never stop at Amanda’s window and glance in on my way across her yard. If I did it would just be to take notes for my future make out sessions with girlfriends who will have smiles that don’t make me feel stupid. But I don’t.
I did make out with Theresa Williams two months ago in the back yard of a party at Terrence Rhodes’ house. She was wearing a sweatshirt so she looked less bony than usual and besides I just needed the practice. Afterwards she said that we were going out and I told her that she was a bad kisser, which was only half the truth and the other half is something that I can’t talk about, but I swear it doesn’t have anything to do with Amanda.
Amanda and Thomas have been together for five months, which is longer than anyone else in our grade has ever gone out with anyone, so it seems like it’s pretty serious. So, if there was some weirdo universe where Amanda kissed me behind that tree, and where my entire chest and stomach felt like they were filled with tiny ticklish pieces of fur or confetti or something, I’d be pretty confused right now. Luckily, that didn’t happen and I feel completely normal and nothing on my insides feels like it’s been rearranged at all.
One time Thomas asked me who I thought the prettiest girl in our grade was and I asked him if he wanted the truth. This is because I can not lie to my best friend, but I know that sometimes people would prefer that you lie and I guess if he ever asked me not to tell him something for his own good I could lie then. But he said he wanted the truth and so I told him Amanda. I thought he might hit me but he just said “I know, man. She’s so fucking hot.” Thomas doesn’t say “fucking” very often so I knew he was trying to make sure that I was paying attention to what he was saying. He put his hand on my back. “I’m glad you support me, man.” I wasn’t sure what that meant but I guess he was saying that me saying Amanda was hot meant that I was happy for him that she was his girl. I guess that should be true.
My mom doesn’t seem to like Amanda’s family very much and every time she runs into Amanda’s mom she ends up in our kitchen telling my dad how “waspy” the Lanes are. I guess I know what she means. Amanda’s mom is just like a taller version of Amanda with her skin pulled a little bit tighter, and I guess they both seem like they might be hiding some kind of poison stinger behind their backs. The smile that’s hard to look at might just be a trick to get you stung, you know?
It’s good that Amanda did not kiss me behind that tree and that I didn’t feel her boobs pressed against my t-shirt and that she didn’t tell me afterwards she wanted to break up with Thomas to go out with me because I was a nicer kisser, because if she did than I would probably have run home and put my entire head under the kitchen sink to calm down before Thomas came over and then when he did I would have been really freaked out and he would keep asking me what was wrong and I would keep saying ‘nothing’ even though that wouldn’t be true and then I would have a feeling in my stomach even worse than the one I would have had when Amanda’s mouth was so soft, a feeling that I was keeping something from my best-friend-since-third-grade and then Thomas might have suggested that we go over to Amanda’s and I might have flinched or made some kind of weird face and he might have said “what, man?” and I might have shrugged and, not knowing what to say, I might have said that I thought she was kind of a bitch for not letting him feel up her shirt yet after a whole five months and Thomas might have looked really thoughtful and then said “you’re right man” and then later, after his mom agreed to let him spend the night since it was a Friday, he might suggest that we play some kind of joke on Amanda and we might have grabbed all of the toilet paper in my bathroom and snuck out and thrown it all up in her trees and then the next day Amanda’s mom might come over and ask my mom about it and I might start crying and Thomas might call me a pussy and get on his bike and go home and then Amanda’s mom might tell her that we had done it and Amanda might not speak to me or Thomas for a whole week at school, she might just smile her terrible way and make us both feel small, so small. And Thomas might forgive me for letting on that we had rolled the house, but I might never forget that I hadn’t told him about what really happened with Amanda and then one day, two months later, when I had a new girlfriend – Stacy Park, who is almost as pretty as Amanda and has much bigger boobs – Amanda might smile her terrible smile at us in class and then pass Thomas a note that he will read and then crumple up into a ball and then he might stare at his desk for awhile before staring at me for awhile and we will all know everything, and then Thomas might hit me in the face and Stacy might break up with me after Amanda tells her the whole story too, and then I might be alone almost all the time and then one day I would ride my bike past Amanda’s house and see Thomas’ bike locked to the tree and I would not, I would never, lower my head and look into their window and see his hands underneath her sweater, see them holding each other and see Amanda smile some different smile, one that I’d never seen before, a smile that would make me look away and make my feet feel heavy with everything inside of me dropped right into them.
So, it’s good that Amanda didn’t kiss me, even if it might have all felt worth it anyway.
Labels: mywriting
6.14.2008
Jeff Wins!
The genius / BFF / hero Jeff Freeman made me this album cover. I am so excited I could just explode. Off to practice the banjolele. Photo by Annie Brooks.
Labels: music, premadebears
6.13.2008
12 Tracks From Your Favorite Fuckup!
Ridiculous. My life, that is. Completely farcical.
Since that's the case, why spend time doing anything other than coming up with names for "my band" 's future albums?
Premade Bears - A Grey Zone For Baby-Faced Adults
Premade Bears - Is In Your Extended Network [online release only EP]
Premade Bears - Fuck Trains, Fuck Boys, Fuck All
Premade Bears - Blue Balls For Your Heart Parts
Premade Bears - An Animal Makes A Mistake
Premade Bears - ;s are for Lovers
Premade Bears - Boom Boom! [girl groups covers EP]
Premade Bears - Another Mysterious Bruise On My Arm?
Since that's the case, why spend time doing anything other than coming up with names for "my band" 's future albums?
Premade Bears - A Grey Zone For Baby-Faced Adults
Premade Bears - Is In Your Extended Network [online release only EP]
Premade Bears - Fuck Trains, Fuck Boys, Fuck All
Premade Bears - Blue Balls For Your Heart Parts
Premade Bears - An Animal Makes A Mistake
Premade Bears - ;s are for Lovers
Premade Bears - Boom Boom! [girl groups covers EP]
Premade Bears - Another Mysterious Bruise On My Arm?
6.12.2008
I [heart] The Internets Roundup: 6.6.08 - 6.12.08
Kind of paltry this week; I've been distracted. Real life!
Dooce guest blogger Sarah Brown relates the 'three best bits of relationship advice ever given, I immediately subscribe to her blog.
I AM COMPLETELY IN LOVE WITH THIS JEWELRY.
Modified Hitler. What do we think?
Oh, nature. You so crazy. Ahhdfjkhgfdjkgdf.
And lastly, to brighten your day, this old Czech cartoon - "The Mole & The Music" (via Drawn!). One time all my dreams were about moles for an entire week. True story.
Dooce guest blogger Sarah Brown relates the 'three best bits of relationship advice ever given, I immediately subscribe to her blog.
I AM COMPLETELY IN LOVE WITH THIS JEWELRY.
Modified Hitler. What do we think?
Oh, nature. You so crazy. Ahhdfjkhgfdjkgdf.
And lastly, to brighten your day, this old Czech cartoon - "The Mole & The Music" (via Drawn!). One time all my dreams were about moles for an entire week. True story.
6.09.2008
4 Top 10 Lists
As you may have gathered if you have ever been within ten yards of me on the internet or IRL, I like lists. Because I am a self-indulgent and somewhat bored little lady, here are some lists.
Favorite Bob Dylan Songs [Today]
10. Going, Going, Gone
9. Don't Think Twice, It's Alright
8. You Ain't Goin' Nowhere
7. To Ramona
6. Boots Of Spanish Leather
5. Girl Of The North Country
4. Standing In The Doorway
3. Restless Farewell
2. Most Of The Time
1. You're Gonna Make Me Lonesome When You Go
Favorite Drinks Available At The BookPeople Cafe
10. Hot Soy Chai.
9. Coca Cola. In a can. Cold.
8. Strawberry/Vanilla Italian Cream Soda.
7. African Nectar Hot Tea.
6. Mocha Shake.
5. Lavender Lemonade.
4. Double Shot of Espresso + Honey.
3. Vanilla or Almond Macchiato
2. Iced Coffee.
1. Double Short Soy Almond Latte.
Things To Draw
10. Robots.
9. 'People' with human faces and robot bodies.
8. Owls.
7. Bears.
6. Bunnies.
5. Girls in animal (almost always bunny) suits.
4. Boys in animal (usually bear or bunny) suits.
3. Monsters, with my eyes closed.
2. Jeff and everyone else I know.
1. Myself.
Things To Mix With Scrambled Eggs To Make Me Happy
10. Fresh basil.
9. Fake chicken.
8. Bell peppers.
7. Potatoes.
6. Cheese in any other form.
5. Tomatoes.
4. Tofu.
3. Mushrooms.
2. Onions.
1. Cheese in queso form.
Favorite Bob Dylan Songs [Today]
10. Going, Going, Gone
9. Don't Think Twice, It's Alright
8. You Ain't Goin' Nowhere
7. To Ramona
6. Boots Of Spanish Leather
5. Girl Of The North Country
4. Standing In The Doorway
3. Restless Farewell
2. Most Of The Time
1. You're Gonna Make Me Lonesome When You Go
Favorite Drinks Available At The BookPeople Cafe
10. Hot Soy Chai.
9. Coca Cola. In a can. Cold.
8. Strawberry/Vanilla Italian Cream Soda.
7. African Nectar Hot Tea.
6. Mocha Shake.
5. Lavender Lemonade.
4. Double Shot of Espresso + Honey.
3. Vanilla or Almond Macchiato
2. Iced Coffee.
1. Double Short Soy Almond Latte.
Things To Draw
10. Robots.
9. 'People' with human faces and robot bodies.
8. Owls.
7. Bears.
6. Bunnies.
5. Girls in animal (almost always bunny) suits.
4. Boys in animal (usually bear or bunny) suits.
3. Monsters, with my eyes closed.
2. Jeff and everyone else I know.
1. Myself.
Things To Mix With Scrambled Eggs To Make Me Happy
10. Fresh basil.
9. Fake chicken.
8. Bell peppers.
7. Potatoes.
6. Cheese in any other form.
5. Tomatoes.
4. Tofu.
3. Mushrooms.
2. Onions.
1. Cheese in queso form.
Labels: drawing, food, lists, music
The Perfect Summer.
I need to get away. Would anyone like to go to the ocean? Right now?
I'll provide the boombox, mix CDs, and sugary snacks if you provide the car.
OH AND IN CASE YOU DIDN'T GET THE MEMO: THIS IS THE OFFICIAL JAM OF SUMMER of 2008:
K, THX.
6.08.2008
THANK GOD HE'S WEARING A HELMET
I LOVE IT WHEN CNN IMITATES THE ONION.
It's just as funny, but it's real life!:
- Their own version of the “hand shake.”
- The outing was cut short by a downpour.
- 'The Huckabee Heimlich'
- I want to go to the Magic Kingdom with Hillary.
It's just as funny, but it's real life!:
- Their own version of the “hand shake.”
- The outing was cut short by a downpour.
- 'The Huckabee Heimlich'
- I want to go to the Magic Kingdom with Hillary.
6.06.2008
Miniature Soundtracks : Episode Five
Miniature Soundtracks is my small experiment in mp3 blogging. I'll be using a beloved image from my flickr photostream or favorites, reflect on it for a few sentences, and then give you a song that evokes the same feelings. If your photo or song is featured and you'd rather it not be, let me know and I'll take it down immediately.
This is me. Sometimes when I'm alone and bored, I take pictures of myself. I don't think it is all that weird of a way to pass the time in and of itself -- it's just like looking at a mirror, but fancier! But because of the internet inviting us all to share more and more of our alone time with everyone else on the face of the planet, it has become pretty weird. I'm certainly not the only one, as a quick glance at flickr can reveal, but... still. It seems to be a symptom of a larger phenomenon of the control that 'social networking' gives us over our own image. I had an argument about this a few days ago in which I asserted that we exercise plenty of control over our persona in real life too, and the internet isn't really so different in this regard as people make it out to be. I think that's true. I don't think that trying to assert a charming, intelligent, attractive face on the internet is all that much more common or different from dressing well, choosing your words carefully, or cleaning your apartment before people come over IRL. That said, the internet -- especially lately -- does provide us with a particularly juicy chance to reinvent ourselves and to pick and choose the qualities and angles we reveal. But it's more complicated than that: the internet provides us with the opportunity to be 'alone' and to communicate and interact with other people, at the same time! I don't even think twice about sitting in front of my computer in my underwear and a t-shirt and some kind of weird food like an entire bowl full of broccoli or an ice cream container with a package of pecans dumped into it, all the while composing some kind of stunningly poetic list of the times and places I like to hear music so that my friends and crushes can marvel at my magic heart. Or LastFM!! You know that I'm listening to Alejandro Escovedo at my apartment at 5:34 in the morning! Why am I awake? Shit!
I digress.
A couple years back, I remember having a conversation with Sarah Go about how the pictures we like most of ourselves and the pictures our friends and family like most of us rarely overlap. The pictures where I think I look my best are, for the most part, decidedly not pictures that my momma would put in a frame. I'm grabbing at straws as to why this is, but I'm thinking that we don't see our own faces all that often when we're having any kind of real life experience: laughing, crying, arguing, or even listening. We see our faces in the mirror (or the digital camera viewfinder) and our brains are relatively free from outside experience in those moments. Your face when you're alone is the face you're used to, but your loved ones see you differently: they see you reacting to them (and the world in general). I'm not arguing that the picture above is 'fake'. It's me, just as real as laughing, dancing, or laying on the floor at the Texas Women's Conference with a hoodie scrunched over my face is me. But... I'm alone. This picture is like a tape recording of a tree falling in a forest with no one around to hear it. For better or for worse, the internets (and the cameras and the iphoto) encourage us to do with photos what people have been doing for centuries with words: communicate the impossible beauty and mystery of our solitary inner lives. Or, y'know, feel pretty.
Just Be Simple (acoustic) - Songs:Ohia from the Magnolia Electric Co. bonus disc.
This is me. Sometimes when I'm alone and bored, I take pictures of myself. I don't think it is all that weird of a way to pass the time in and of itself -- it's just like looking at a mirror, but fancier! But because of the internet inviting us all to share more and more of our alone time with everyone else on the face of the planet, it has become pretty weird. I'm certainly not the only one, as a quick glance at flickr can reveal, but... still. It seems to be a symptom of a larger phenomenon of the control that 'social networking' gives us over our own image. I had an argument about this a few days ago in which I asserted that we exercise plenty of control over our persona in real life too, and the internet isn't really so different in this regard as people make it out to be. I think that's true. I don't think that trying to assert a charming, intelligent, attractive face on the internet is all that much more common or different from dressing well, choosing your words carefully, or cleaning your apartment before people come over IRL. That said, the internet -- especially lately -- does provide us with a particularly juicy chance to reinvent ourselves and to pick and choose the qualities and angles we reveal. But it's more complicated than that: the internet provides us with the opportunity to be 'alone' and to communicate and interact with other people, at the same time! I don't even think twice about sitting in front of my computer in my underwear and a t-shirt and some kind of weird food like an entire bowl full of broccoli or an ice cream container with a package of pecans dumped into it, all the while composing some kind of stunningly poetic list of the times and places I like to hear music so that my friends and crushes can marvel at my magic heart. Or LastFM!! You know that I'm listening to Alejandro Escovedo at my apartment at 5:34 in the morning! Why am I awake? Shit!
I digress.
A couple years back, I remember having a conversation with Sarah Go about how the pictures we like most of ourselves and the pictures our friends and family like most of us rarely overlap. The pictures where I think I look my best are, for the most part, decidedly not pictures that my momma would put in a frame. I'm grabbing at straws as to why this is, but I'm thinking that we don't see our own faces all that often when we're having any kind of real life experience: laughing, crying, arguing, or even listening. We see our faces in the mirror (or the digital camera viewfinder) and our brains are relatively free from outside experience in those moments. Your face when you're alone is the face you're used to, but your loved ones see you differently: they see you reacting to them (and the world in general). I'm not arguing that the picture above is 'fake'. It's me, just as real as laughing, dancing, or laying on the floor at the Texas Women's Conference with a hoodie scrunched over my face is me. But... I'm alone. This picture is like a tape recording of a tree falling in a forest with no one around to hear it. For better or for worse, the internets (and the cameras and the iphoto) encourage us to do with photos what people have been doing for centuries with words: communicate the impossible beauty and mystery of our solitary inner lives. Or, y'know, feel pretty.
Just Be Simple (acoustic) - Songs:Ohia from the Magnolia Electric Co. bonus disc.
Labels: miniaturesoundtracks, music
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